The Right Idea.

My Luke sure does have the right idea.

Through my travels last night, I observed

Luke's new wallpaper on his computer.

Is he amazing or what!?!  Time after time

throughout this past year, family and 

friends have either spoken, emailed, or

texted me this scripture.  My sweet Luke

proclaimed it loud and clear!!!  He has

hidden this scripture in his heart!!!!

I especially love the words that he has

chosen to capitalize.  

Cozy Sunday.

Sunday is the day that our family has always

set aside to restrict outside activity, spend

time together, and regroup for the busy week

ahead.  Our boys and I are trying to adjust

to "Family Sunday" without our special Dad.

Sundays with Dad always meant fun dinners

after church and cozy time in the family room

afterwards.  As we still teater between shock

and reality, we went to church and cozied up

together with fun flicks and snacks afterward. 

My Tim carried on the football tradition

as he cheered his 49ers on to victory.  The day

was made extra special with homemade

peanut butter macadamia nut cookies baked

by a friend!!  One thing for certain, there has

never been a lack of food over the past several

weeks.

So, together my little group and I made it

through our Family Sunday.  Thankfully, we

have others who partner with us as we

begin this very different journey in our

lives. As always, we remember our many

blessings and are grateful for the promise

of eternal life with our Father in Heaven.

. . . so cannot believe that 2012 will soon

be a memory . . .  Looking forward to the

brand new year, eagerly awaiting that

which the Lord has in store for us! 

Therapy . . . Jilly Style.

 Three quilts are in the hopper . . .

quilting is THE best therapy next

to family and friends.  I do so love

my people, they ALWAYS know

when to call, message, email,

stop by, or send a card through 

the mail. What have I ever done to

be so incredibly blessed.  Tonight

Cathy, Duane, Diane, and Anne 

came to over for dinner and cards.

They.are.THE.bestest on the entire

planet.  Forever friends are the

greatest treasure!!!

 I am excited about my new quilt

projects . . . They give me plenty of 

time to reflect and pray!!!

I am grateful for friends who remind

me that it was in my old life that

planning days, weeks, and months

ahead was possible.  Concentrating

on baby steps . . .  

I am so grateful for those who know

just what to say and when to say it!!

How could one of my besties know that

Wednesday night is the perfect night

for popsicles and Snickers bars . . . 

I tell ya . . . when it came to friends,

my Jesus sure poured them out

abundantly to me!!!  As I navigate such

unfamiliar territory, I am grateful that

I do not have to do so alone!!!

"Is any pleasure on earth as great as a circle

of Christian friends by a good fire?"  -C.S. Lewis

Blessed.

A sweet friend brought me this adorable little

tapestry the other day.  Those who do not 

walk with my Jesus would be tempted to 

question whether or not I am blessed at 

the moment.  Quite the contrary is true, while

my path seems difficult, my entire life has

been changed, and my future seems uncertain

to me, I am most.definitely.blessed.

Every time I look into the eyes of our boys,

I realize just how blessed I am.

Each time the phone rings and it is a

dear friend inquiring about my day,

I realize just how blessed I am.

When I see the new day dawn, 

I know that I am blessed.

When I hear laughter in our home,

I know that I am blessed.

I know my God and know for

certain that He would not have

us treading these waters if He 

did not have some pretty.amazing

plans in store . . . I am most certainly

blessed.

Crushed, bruised, broken, and in

pain . . . But tremendously blessed.

So Long Cali.

Four days in LB is always good for

the soul.  It seems as though CHRISTmas

was about six years ago.  There are

moments that I doubt our special LB

is the best place for our little family to

visit, but it was most necessary for

us to visit there as we had a most

special ceremony and spread our

special Dad's ashes in the ocean.

We were all dreading that moment

so much . . . we even toyed with the

idea of bringing them back home

with us and making another trip to

the beach to scatter them when we

felt more ready.  After a totally restless

night just thinking about the next

day, Grandy, all of the boys and I

all jumped out of bed at 3:00a.m., grabbed  

the special box, and stumbled down to the

beach.  With a TEARFUL so long and a

very special circle of prayer, we scattered

our Dad's ashes in one of his most

favoritist places. It is always pretty 

difficult for us to leave LB, but today

really tugged at the old heart strings.

Someone very special is missing from

our lives.  We are depending on our 

Jesus to show us the way and illuminate

our new paths that we must now travel.

We are confident in God's promises and

do so look forward to fulfilling the plan

that He has laid out before our family.

So long . . . only for a brief moment.

Beach Day 3.

For our family, returning to Laguna

was certainly a bittersweet experience.

I have been coming to Laguna since

I was three years old.  Mike and I 

started coming to Laguna when we

were married in 1984, returning at

least twice or more times each year.

 We feel as though we have pushed

through a milestone by coming to one

of our family's special hotspots.  Even

the stops on the way down were

pretty.darn.difficult.

 We were talking about whether we will

continue to come back to LB and the boys

thought that we should continue this family

tradition.  Zach and I were talking about

our footsteps on the beach.  We were talking

about the footsteps poem where there are

only one set of footsteps.  This would 

represent where Jesus was carrying you.

Zach told me about a poem that he read

that stated that there were there were long

grooved in between the footprints.  This

represents where God is dragging you.

Yep, I have had a wee bit of dragging.

Truth be told, lots of dragging over the

past year.  It will be exciting as our

loving Father begins to gently set me

down and I begin to walk on my own

two wobbly legs . . . 

Another tradition . . . The Greeter's

Corner . . .

Happy Birthday Tim and Jesus.

 Happy, happy birthday to my wonderful Tim!

You are such an incredible person!  Where

could I possibly begin; except to say that you

are so devoted to our family!  I am so grateful

and thankful for how you care for others and

make what is important to them important

to you.  I am so thankful how you love the

Lord which is demonstrated through your

unconditional acceptance for others.

 I consider you my friend.  We have been

through so much and have much

more to experience together!!!

 I am so excited that we were able to 

"celebrate" in one of our family's favorite

places. 

Tim, you are truly a blessing!  As we navigate

these new waters, I realize that we will 

establish new and different traditions and

am grateful that you are in for the long

haul.

Special birthday blessings 2-6!!!

Merry Christmas Eve!

 We made it to Laguna Beach to 

somehow begin to celebrate our 

first CHRISTmas without our

sweet Dad.  The drive produced

much joy and buckets of tears.

We were praying that we did not

expect too much of ourselves as

Laguna Beach holds TONS of

memories for our family.

 After TONS of help, we finally got everything

to our room and the festivities began!!!!

 We opened several gifts and then

headed to downtown Laguna to

celebrate CHRISTmas Eve with

yummy pizza . . . always our first

night tradition.

The boys gave me my blog published in a

book . . . after a bucketload of tears, they

showed me the dedication page written in

one simple sentence by my Mike . . .

 Happy early birthday Sweet Tim . . . 26!!!!

Sweet and silly pictures of our incredibly

different CHRISTmas!!  We are still the same

family who loves each other so very much, 

but finding new ways to forge very unfamiliar

territory!!!  Now to try and catch some sleep.

We are praying that the salt air will provide

much respite for this very tired crew who

have gone on fumes for several weeks!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS BLESSINGS!!!!!

Secret Santa.

 Tonight we had our annual Secret Santa

gift exchange.  Early in November, each of

our family members draws a name and

purchases a special gift for that person.

 We started the evening off with Rudolph and

Santa pancakes!!!  (Anything with that much

whipped cream is amazing!!!)

I could not have made it without all of my

elves in the kitchen.  This entire day has been

emotional and bittersweet.

 The tears began to flow as I opened our

family picture.  We recently had our family

pictures taken by our resident photog, Sam.

We have not had a chance to have any

of them made.  He chose the very best one

and had it blown up and framed.  Needless

to say, I am not.over.it.yet.

 Mike had drawn Sam's name.  In November,

it took everything he had to go to the mall to

pick out this tool set for Sam.  He wanted to

make sure that I knew where he had hidden

the gift and to wrap it for him for his Sam.

Tears . . . joy . . . tears . . . joy!

Santa's sleigh is packed and ready to fly to

SoCal early in the morning!!!!!

God sent a very special Secret Santa gift to 

me this morning.  Mike has an AMAZING

extended family of aunts, uncles, and cousins

who live in Portland, Oregon.  We.love.them.

so.so.so.so.so.so.much!!  They came to 

visit our Dad in July.  Last night we were

really missing them.  We were tinkering around

with the airlines thinking of paying them a

visit . . . I was so excited that Mike's cousin,

Pam emailed me this morning just to say

that she was thinking of us . . . sending hugs . . .

How great is our God.  Amazing.I.know!

It is difficult as I struggle with so many

emotions.  I know with all my heart that He

knows what He is doing, but it is so very,

very painful at the same time!!!!

Secret Santa Blessings!